Had a great time on my work trip - got to see many friends, and do some much needed shopping as I haven't quite sussed out the stores here to find which ones are affordable and work for my Hobbit-like stature. I also stocked up on coffee (the coffee here is NOT good) and Twizzlers - two of the necessities in life.
I could write pages and pages recounting the hilarity that was my US trip, but since this blog is about my adventures in Germany, I'll just leave that to your imaginations. Suffice it to say that vodka is no longer my friend, and I have a new appreciation for seafood platters.
My flight back was one of the best flights I've ever had. Why, you ask? Was it because I was upgraded to a first class suite and waited on hand and foot? Was it because I was seated next to some devastatingly handsome, single, articulate man? Was it because I didn't have to take a bus to get to the plane? The correct answer is D) none of the above. It was because, for the first time EVER in my life, I slept through the entire flight. Not a couple hours. Not even dozing off after dinner. I literally got on the plane, managed to keep my eyes semi-open during the safety briefing and then woke up when the lights came on and the captain announced 20 minutes to landing. I have to thank my good friend KR for introducing me to the magic that is Advil PM. Two of those suckers and I was OUT. Which is fascinating because I have literally tried taking Ambien (which put me more into what I would call a fugue state than sleeping), Dramamine (which resulted in semi-sleep and a lot of drooling) and copious amounts of alcohol - all in the hopes of catching some much needed sleep and resetting my body clock. For the first time in all my flying history, I landed fully rested and acclimated to my new time zone. I had a bit of trouble falling asleep last night, but nothing compared to my usual days of sleepless agony after hopping the ocean.
I landed, gathered my two HUGE suitcases (did I mention I traveled over with just one?) and hailed a taxi as ain't nobody got time to be lugging two huge suitcases in 88 degree weather on the train. My taxi driver was a very friendly Turkish woman who had quite a hilarious grasp on the English language. Rather, it was more like she kept grabbing at English, and English kept squirming away. It was touch and go in terms of communicating until I shared that I was heading to Turkey in August for holiday with my good friend and ultimate travel buddy WF. Once I was able to properly pronounce the name of the area I was going to, she was off like a rocket. Apparently, we will be "finding many of the husbands" and "so many muches of the food stuffs". Additionally we can look forward to "watering ourselves" and "doing the suntime". She also told me that everybody in Turkey knows her, and if I have "some of them troubles", to just say her name and they will "calm it all to the down". All this was taking place while she was seriously driving like a bat out of hell being chased by Michael Bay special effects. At one point I KNOW we were on three wheels taking a turn. It reminded me of my trip to Istanbul, also fondly known as "the near-death experience".
After I lugged my suitcases up the four flights of stairs in my temporary flat, I had the pleasure of putting my fan together. I'm glad I was smart enough to buy one a couple weeks ago before it got hot - but I forgot that the instructions would be in German. Thank goodness for pictures. I only put it together wrong three times before getting it right. Considering that I once put an entire set of flat pack shelves together completely backwards, I was very, very proud of myself. I spent the rest of the weekend doing laundry, picking up groceries, and watching the first season of Empire on my iPad. I was all over that free hotel wi-fi in the U.S. (PS - can I just say how much I LOVE Cookie?)
I came back to my office to find a fan ready and waiting for me, all put together by our trusty assistant. Did I mention that the office here does not have air conditioning? Luckily we have huge big windows that open out sideways or from the top, and there seems to be a good breeze. Apparently in Germany, it is a law that workers be near a window and exposed to sunlight and fresh air. Having spent many a year trapped in the purgatory that is the modern cubicle farm, this is a very welcome change. Lunch today was Wienerschnitzel - for real. Actually, it was a choice of that or something which looked suspiciously like vegetables sauteed in butter, topped with dill yoghurt. I grabbed the schnitzel and a salad - have to say, it wasn't too bad. Following lunch, I had a meeting with a colleague who had an excellent grasp of English - and also seemed to think that dropping the F bomb to describe people, places, situations, the weather - was appropriate. So that made for a fun half hour.
I also had another German lesson - during which I realized that what I have been saying all along when people ask me if I speak German is HILARIOUSLY wrong. I have been saying "Ich nein spreichen sie Deutsch" - which I thought meant "I don't speak German". What it REALLY means is "I no speak you German". Which, in my defense, is sort of what I was trying to say. But it explains the pained looks I received my first few days here. What I should be saying is "Ich spreiche kein Deutsch" or "Ich spreiche venig Deutsch" - either I speak no German, or I speak very little German. I also am learning that the letters lie! An "s" is a "z" sound, unless there is a "t" after it, in which case the "st" becomes a "scht" sound. "V" is most often an "f" sound, except when it isn't. The words for state and city are ridiculously close to my hearing - "Staat" is state and "Stadt" is city. One is "schtaaat" and one is "schtadtt". Yeah. Try that after a few beers.
I'm enjoying learning, though. It's coming in handy. Like today, when I got my Wienerschnitzel, I was able to say "Enschultigung, kein (points to gravy), bitte" - and it worked like magic. Between my tiny vocabulary and my awesome charades skills, I think I'm going to do just fine.
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